Immense Silence in the Cremation Ground

We buried Om!

I liked Om Swamiji's name so much that when I got the chance to name somebody, I named the tender being as ‘Om’. How delighted I was when I picked up this name. I always remembered him while saying the name. His memoirs, his teachings, his knowledge, his values, his principals, his command over so many subjects inspired me to namesake someone along with those good virtues and qualities. Whether all the time I was chanting his name or visualizing the one with the name ‘Om’, it hardly mattered to me. Nevertheless, I was on cloud nine!

“Papa, I will come along with you to the cremation ground.” I insisted as he was sick from a prolonged illness, and I used to accompany him in all the business dealings and other events.

“Females do not go to cremation grounds.” He softly said.

“I am taking care of your business which is a male dominated one. Please allow me.”

When we both were adamant on our points and could not convince each other, I suggested a middle path, “I will accompany you only up to the main gate of the premises.”

“Agreed.” He said, now more softly.

Unaware of the peace pact between me and my father, our driver parked the car inside the premises as there was no parking space outside. As soon as my father got out of the car, he looked towards me and ordered, “Stay here.” I nodded. This was my first visit to a cremation ground. To my surprise there was nobody except the security guard. There were trees planted in a line, shrubs growing in a cluster and some seasonal plants here and there in the beds. Overall, the greenery was breathtaking. The place was so serene and calm, that one yearned to meditate. Some birds were there, not chirping rather mingling with the quietness of the surroundings. Peacocks were standing under the shade or sitting on the green grass without any fear. They too were on silent mode. Not even a single leaf was moving to make any kind of sound or to create any rustle in the peaceful environment. All living beings were still and silent. I had never experienced such a deep silence.  An engulfing silence!

On that day, I was devoid of any emotion of sadness, grief or pain. If there was a little bit emotion somewhere left in me, it was to take care of my father so that he didn't break down. I saw my father coming back after performing the rituals. I looked towards his face. His face was calm. There was no grief, no disturbance, no sorrow, no agitation rather an immense peace. As if he was taking along some peace strings from the serenity of the environment with him and leaving behind the sadness of the sorrowful past. In my heart, I knew that he was going through one of the toughest phases of his life but not a single tear came out of his eyes. Silently, I admired how strong he was!

While returning home, I was chanting 'Om' without visualizing 'buried Om'. After all we all are mortal beings! 

Pic : Pexels

An Open Confession

“Oh my God! This beggar recites abuses like if he is chanting a mantra.” I thought when I saw a shabby beggar hurling abuses without taking a pause in between. He was so clumsy that it seemed that last time he must have bathed in his past life. When I was in my mid-twenties, daily I used to visit Hanuman Temple in Sanatan Dharam Mandir, Hisar. Whenever his time and my time to visit the temple clashed, it only disturbed me as his mind was as dirty as his clothes. I tried my best to distance myself from him. Whenever I saw him in the temple, I stayed away from him and sometimes I waited for him to finish his special prayers. Although I wanted to put my hands on my ears to shut those filthy words, but I could not do out of care that I might be hurting him even more as I did not know from which brutal situations he was passing through or had passed through which resulted in his severe bitterness for every human being and even for God.

Almost 400 years back, this temple was constructed. Hanumanji was engraved on a stone. From then, every day the priest did the shringar (decoration) of Hanumanji with sindoor, chameli ka tel, silver foil, eye-catching dresses, vibrant angvastram, adorable garlands of artificial flowers of various sizes and stunning silver mukut  and other jewelry. It was the only deity towards which I felt a strong attraction. The more I looked at it, the more I wanted to admire it. I just wanted to appreciate Him without blinking my eyes. Forgetting about the outside world, I used to continuously watch Him, to get fully absorbed in the nectar of His Divine Love. He was irresistible. I loved to see Him, I loved to pray to Him, I loved to sing the glories of Him, and I loved to bring gifts for Him. For a couple of years, almost daily I used to visit that temple. Later, when my life became busy, I visited it as soon as I found the time. Even now, whenever I visit Hisar I never miss the chance to have a glance of my loving deity. My profession changed, my lifestyle changed, my spiritual experiences changed, my city changed, my color of hair changed but my prayers remain the same to Hanumanji. What I prayed to Him in my twenties I still pray the same.

Recently contemplating on my life, I realized that I never tried to help that beggar in any way neither with my soothing words nor by helping him materialistically. Instead, I distanced myself from him. I never tried to understand the reasons or the situations behind his utmost frustrations, that lead to him from saying those dirty words instead of God’s name even in a peaceful and serene place like a temple. What I did with him, Hanumanji did the same to me. Hanumanji distanced Himself from me. How much I worshipped Him, how much I cried for Him to come, how much I asked Him to help me, how many times I chanted Hanuman Chalisa but all my prayers went unheard.

I made a mistake, which I could never correct. Paul Bear Bryant said, “When you make a mistake, there are three things you should ever do about it; admit it, learn from it and don’t repeat it.”

Pic : Hanuman Temple, Sanatan Dharam Mandir, Hisar 

Love in Action - Sharing of My Favorite Piece of Jewelry

Will I be able to happily part with my favorite piece of jewelry?

I opened my fist in which I was holding a beautiful necklace made up of gold studded with various gems. How many times has my mother visited the jeweler to blend it perfectly with my taste? The jeweler had innovatively shaped and soldered the golden metal and very delicately studded the tiny pieces of gems and stones in it to give it a unique design. That novel piece of art was always close to my heart. Now, as a saintly heart I decided to part it with, to make someone else's life beautiful. I gave a last close look to it. I closed my eyes to pray. I closed my fist and bent towards the driver’s seat window and handed that to the woman standing near to the car. She was happy to receive this unexpected gift. She expressed her gratitude in a very decent way. Her etiquette surprised me.

A wife of a car driver with such decent manners! I could not resist myself and asked the driver when the car started moving again on the zigzag roads. He told me, “I am only eighth pass. I could not study further because my father died when I was in school, soon after I have to start earning, but my wife is a postgraduate in science and is presently teaching in a reputed school. And we both opted for love marriage to which our families happily agreed. I have two beautiful kids. We are a happy family but in Corona time there were almost negligible tourists. I could not bear the maintenance cost of my two taxis therefore I had to sell my one car at a very low price. It was a quite big financial loss for us.”

Earlier as soon as I boarded the taxi, he told me that he forgot to bring the mask. I told him that I had an extra mask if you wish I could share it with him. He said, “My house is situated on the road, moreover my wife will come to handover the mask to me. I can buy a new one from the market, but I do not want to waste my money.” I then and there decided to bless them with wealth and happiness. Charity means love in action.

Harold S. Kushner said, “Do things for people not because of who they are or what they do in return, but because of who you are.”

Pic : Pixabay

Rowdy Baby - A Viral Song

I was damn tense!

I twisted, turned and tried hard to sleep but could not because I was disturbed. One business related problem was causing anxiety to me. Whenever I am tense, I find myself addicted to mobile. I searched for my tension-soothing device. While surfing I came across a Tollywood actress ‘Sai Pallavi’ who rejected a two crore advertisement deal with a fairness cream calling her as ‘Indian Color’ and the doctor actress further added that Africans have their own color, and they are beautiful. She is not a trained dancer, but her dance moves are like a breeze, and she dances like a gazelle. I typed ‘Dances by Sai Pallavi’ and the search results showed ‘Rowdy Baby’. I loved this song, the beats, the moves, the set, the dresses and the shoes. I watched it 8-10 times which relaxed my mind and I could then easily slip into sleep.

‘Rowdy baby’ song from the movie ‘Maari-2’ is the most viewed Indian song on YouTube until now. It has about 140 crores views. Sai Pallavi and Dhanush are shaking their legs on Prabhu Deva’s dance steps. I do not know Tamil, but I still I know its lyrics. :) Some points I would like to share that I noticed while watching it repeatedly are as follows:-

1.      The person with black hat is holding a guitar but does not know how to play it.

2.      The same person imitates a difficult dance step by Sai Pallavi and falls off.

3.      Sai Pallavi is wearing blue bangles with her white suit, which match perfectly with the latkan hanging from the left side of her waist.

4.      The girl dancing on a dual color Lambretta of olive green and white paint is doing basic steps which she must have learnt in her nursery class. :) Moreover, she has a fear of falling off.

5.      The shoes, decorated as man and woman, are eye-catching.

6.      In the end, you would feel that it was a long shoe advertisement. :D

Till now, I have watched this shoe ad. more than 250 times. :)

The next day in the morning while meditating on Mother Divine I found my mind was relaxed and free from all sorts of worries. I could very easily focus on Her. She blessed me with her darshan. This time Her face was big, the eyes bigger and she was too close to my face as if She wanted to caress and bless me.

Pic : Pixabay

Ice Ice Baby!

Belch! I felt like vomiting.

Sitting on my asana, I bent forward a bit to vomit. Suddenly I had felt a severe sensation of vomiting but that stayed only up to my throat, and nothing came out of my mouth. After I had restricted my diet, I never felt like burping. I could not figure out the reason whether I ate more dry fruits or it was the sudden shoot up of environmental temperature in the hot humid summer. But I knew for sure that I was feeling like sitting amid fire flames. They were burning me from inside as well as from outside. The heat was intense and unbearable for me. It was causing me much discomfort and uneasiness.

I recalled that many years back, I read about a saint that had a burning sensation all over his body due to intense meditation. The burning sensation became intolerable for him. To experience the coolness, he jumped into a nearby pond, but the searing pain did not cease. As soon as I finished my chanting, I hurried for a shower bath. The cooling water refreshed me a little. I felt relieved and relaxed. I did not wipe my body so that coolness remained for a longer time.

Once again, I sat down to do my remaining prayers. There was a feeling of freshness outside but internally the burning sensations of fire flames were engulfing me. I found it unbearable to continue further but with great difficulty somehow, I completed the chanting. I recalled that Swamiji used to eat snow when He was doing intense meditation in the Himalayas. I rushed towards the refrigerator. I opened the freezer, took out the ice tray, twisted it's both ends in opposite directions and popped three ice cubes in my mouth. Slowly the ice started melting in my mouth. I could feel the coolness passing from mouth to gullet then to oesophagus. Cold-water drops calmed the intense heat waves. How many ice cubes in total I ate on that day I do not remember now but definitely the cool-cool formula worked for me.

Whenever any obstacle has hindered my spiritual journey, the wisdom of great saints has always guided me to overcome that. No worldly advice, only with the musings of great men I am treading my solitary path.

Pic : Pixabay

Incorporating Hues

Wassily Kandinsky stated, “Colour is the power, which directly influences the soul.” Colour arouses a psychic vibration, which affects every part of the body, which as result can concomitantly influence one’s moods, emotions, thoughts and behaviour.

“Oh! Such an engulfing sadness on a cute face!” I noticed a small kid wearing a traditional dhoti and kurta, holding the finger of his grandfather with his tiny hand, as soon as I entered the lift. It seemed to me that even the festive mood had not elated him. I gave him a smile anticipating reciprocation.

Ah! I succeeded. A faint smile appeared on his face. A smile breeds a smile. I wished him and he replied with a somewhat bigger smile. His canvas of life was colourless at such a tender age. I was flabbergasted.

Later I came to know that his parents were separated, and he lived with his mother in his maternal grandfather’s house. To fill colours in his life, I bought a big colour set with different types of crayons, pencil colours, sketch pens and watercolours along with some colouring books. I also bought some sweets and namkins for him.

On Friendship Day, I visited him and requested him to be my friend. He smiled. Ah! What a lovely smile he had! He opened the packets and liked all gifts. Then onwards, whenever I met him, I used to gift him a book, a pencil, a piggy bank, a toy or something that would interest a six-year-old boy. He also enjoyed receiving gifts from me. He gifted me a handmade card on my birthday. We became good friends.

I was happy that I could incorporate hues in a young life. Swamiji has filled the colours of peace, bliss, happiness and love in my dull, boring and colourless life, I pay it forward by filling the colours of joy in the child’s life. It was a tiny gesture, but Swamiji says, “Every act counts!”

‘Color up others’ lives became the motto and an essential part of my life. I enlarged my canvas. Whenever I encountered a dull life, I tried to make it vibrant. I fed some, purchased books for some and useful gifted items to others. I presented Swamiji’s books to some and I monetary helped some others. It became a part of my routine.

Whenever I remembered him, I tried to find a suitable person whom I could bless with the colours of happiness and joy. As Maya Angelou said, “Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.” These gestures of mine are tiny steps towards the magnanimous rainbow.

Danny Kaye stated, “Life is a big great canvas; throw all the paint you can at it.” Tippy Tippy Tap, what colour do you want? Which colour do you want your life to be filled with -passionate red, soothing pink, vivid green, glowing yellow, flaming byzantium, calming indigo, peaceful white, radiating ochre or blazing black? To feel the power of colours, add that colour to others’ life and see how colourful your life becomes.

Kindness is a vast colour that only your heart knows how to paint. — Raktivist 

Picture Credits: Pexels 

Everything is POSSIBLE with HIS Blessings!

It is IMPOSSIBLE!

Only He can be so kind. He only can be. He blessed me, as no Guru has ever anointed any disciple so generously.

I prayed to the lineage every day but one night, I prayed to them with fervor and repeatedly requested them to share the truth with me as I was tired of being confused. Three days back, I read about Baba Sri Chandra on the internet and prayed to Him. I started crying and felt His energy in the room. When I could not find the answer to my question on the internet, in books or I could not find anybody who could guide me then I decided to request the lineage to help me on this matter. Just before I was about to finish my prayers, a thought flashed in my mind ‘Google the term ‘XYZ’. This term I had heard only once from Swamiji during His discourse in one of the old Swaminars of the Black Lotus App. I had never come across that term anywhere in any book, on any internet page or in any video.

As soon as I finished my prayers, I Googled the term. It suggested many pages with various headings. I clicked a link to a video, as I knew that this source was authentic and watched the whole video. It did not contain the ‘XYZ’ term, but it told in detail about its synonym term. I returned to Google's main search page and clicked one more option with the heading showing ‘XYZ’ term. I read it. It explained everything in detail. I was shocked. I was overwhelmed. How could He be so kind! I had not served Him for a day. I had not worked for any of His charity work. I had not done anything significant in the construction of the ashram. I was not in any of His Teams. What to say more that because of my shy nature I had not touched His feet physically. And He warm heartedly showered the rare of the rarest blessings on me.

The Guru does not bless the disciple with this so easily. In general, Guru blesses only one disciple with this in his lifetime. I was lucky, nah I was extremely lucky to have such a generous Guru in my life.    

Pic : Pixabay