MA Kali laughed!

“Which fruit do you like to eat?” I said to a dark colour girl in shabby clothes with dishevelled hair.

Her face was stern. May be she did not understand my accent!

I requested the shop vendor to ask her.

“Which fruit do you want to eat? Apple, Orange or Banana?” He asked in a loud voice and the words she could get.

She smiled. She smiled more. She giggled. She giggled more.

“Tell quickly! What do you like?”

She laughed uncontrollably.

“Speak up!” He raised his voice a bit.

In between her laughs, she said with great difficulty. “Apple.”

I picked up some fresh apples from the crate and handed over them to the shopkeeper for weighing.

“1 Kg for Rs. 90/-.” He told.

After completing my Nav Durga Sadhana, I had to donate the set aside money (Rs. 10/- per day) for a noble cause for a girl. It was a coincidence that it totalled the same. I paid the money and turned back. She was still laughing. I handed over the packet to her. She was laughing and swinging in a rhythmic manner.

Crazy!

“Eat one.” I asked her. I was not sure whether she would get any apple to munch on reaching home.

She took a bite from the reddest one. Now, she was laughing hysterically and simultaneously trying to chew the bite. She lost her grip on the apple. And it was on the dusty floor. She laughed. She picked it up. Her hair was frowzled. Her teeth were shinning white. Her tongue was lolling. Her red lips were beaming. She looked darker.

She laughed wildly.

MA Kali was laughing!

A stray pup’s fate

“Come Tommy Come.” A kid of near about 6-7 years old asked a pup who was walking on the pavement.

Tommy was busy exploring the world, did not give an ear to his command.

“Say in Haryanavi (a dialect of Hindi), it will obey you. It didn’t understand English after all it is a stray pup.” I said amusingly. How do I know it is a stray pup?

In the morning, while returning from vegetable market I noticed that a pup of same colour and size was trying to enter the society gate. The security man just touched a latha to it to shoo away. It screaming loudly and ran away. It hid himself in the nearby bushy hedges and the security guard could not find it again. But how he entered the gate amidst so much security?

“Where did you find it?” A little girl of the same age asked that boy. He replied, “I can share it with you if you promise me not to tell anybody else, not even to your best friend.” “God promise!” “In the morning, I went out to buy a packet of pencils and I saw it shivering near the bushes. I gently lift it and hid it in my bag.” He smiled.

“Tommy, eat. Look she has bought churama dipped in milk for you.” The kid took the polythene from the hesitant girl and opened it nicely so that Tommy could put its mouth inside and gulp. The food was sufficient for its three meals. It started eating slowly, after eating a potion, left it and started roaming here and there. The kids were not satisfied. “Tommy have some more. Come Tommy. Be a good boy.” He lovingly said. Tommy took a few more morsels to please them.

After a while, I noticed that the boy was holding Tommy’s neck so that it could not turn his head and said to the girl who still had a fear for Tommy, “Come near and pat it gently! It will not say anything.” Tommy did not move. It was now an obedient boy!

“Tommy, you can play with my balloon.” The girl gave her balloon. Tommy sniffed, touched and kicked it.

“Shhh! Do not make any noise. Tommy is tired. It is sleeping.” The boy instructed the other kids who joined their group. They were all standing close to the bench in the society garden on which it was sleeping. The girl gently moved her arm over Tommy. The boy inquired, “Why are you disturbing it?” The girl softly said, “I was just flying a housefly who sat on its left eye.”

“Whose dog is this?” A grumpy fat aunty asked almost each and everyone in the garden and then reported the matter to the security guard.

The security guard chased it but Tommy was an Olympic athlete. Somehow, he caught him to throw it on the other side of the boundary wall of the society. “Oops! He bit me!” He shouted, lost his grip and it was out of his hands.

 “Do not hurt this poor creature. I will take him out of the main gate.” The boy pleaded. He started playing with it and took him in the direction of main gate of the society.

At night, I heard a sharp piercing cry of a pup; it was so harsh and loud that I woke up. Thereafter continuously, it screamed. I was disturbed. It would stop as soon as chaos was over. But it didn’t stop. What should I do in this chilling winter? Should I search it out in cold dark night? What if I am not able to find it? Might be the shrieks are coming from the other side of the boundary wall as at night far off noise seemed to be close. Moreover, I recalled that I was having a maun vrat (Silence until I finish my particular prayers and charity). What should I do now? My mind would not be silent if a poor creature is in pain. So keeping mouth closed will be of no use. I called security guard and inquired, “A pup is screaming from quite some time. What’s the matter?”

“From which side sound is coming?” He asked.

“Temple side.”

“I will check.”

After 15 minutes, I could only hear the rhythmic horns of the trucks moving fast on the Highway

Annadaan –Mahadaan

 

“Ma, are chole bhature ready?” I used to ask my mother as soon as I opened my eyes every year on 3^rd December until I mastered the art of cooking.

“Ya, chole are ready and I will fry hot bhaturas for you after we all do hawan and you do charity.” This would be my mother’s reply as she was always been an early riser.

My mother’s response would always astir my celebration mood.

For every occasion my menu was fixed – chole bhature. Not only that but whenever I eat out my menu was already decided – chole bhature. I did not like to go in restaurants that did not serve chole bhature. Although I loved to try chole bhature in different restaurants from dhabas to luxurious hotels.

As my age increased, the size and quantity of bhaturas decreased on my plate. With God’s grace, the quantity of donation of chole bhature improved with each passing year.

According to Shrimad DeviBhagwat Mahapuran अन्नदानं महादानं (annadaanam mahadaanam) which means donating foodstuffs is the greatest charity and अन्नदानात्परं दानं न भूतं न भविष्यति। (aanadaanatperam daanm na bhutam n bhavesyate) There is no charity as grand as donation of foodstuffs, neither in the past nor in the future. Because of generous believer in these philosophies, I love to donate edible items as much as possible.

My daily charity includes feeding birds, squirrels and stray animals like cow, bull and dog. I collect my organic kitchen waste like vegetable peels, green leftovers, broccoli stalks and feed stray animals with them. On every weekend, I cook ladoos or halwa to feed stray dogs. It is pleasing as well as sometimes embarrassing that five or six stray dogs always escort me whenever I visit a local market. While travelling in car whenever I notice a group of monkeys, I feed them with fruits, roasted channa or any other edible item that I am carrying in my bag at that time. I feel it is our duty to feed them, as there are no fruiting trees left on the roadside and there is not much food for them in the fields.

I even love to feed different species with my hands. Surprisingly, I had fed biscuits to tree pie on my palm. I had fed baby nilgai with chapatti, rabbit with Armenian cucumber and langoor with roasted channa. I have also fed herbivorous animals like camel, horse, donkey, elephant, goat, sheep etc. It is my ardent wish to feed tiger on my palm. ;)

In the winter season, when there is ample of organic vegetables from farm, I prepare different types of pickles and then gladly distribute them among my employees. I love to prepare meals like puri, chole, halwa after completing any Sadhana especially Devi Sadhana and distribute them in my locality. Whenever I eat out in a restaurant, I always bear my driver’s meal expenses. I generously donate on various occasions in bhandaras in the temples so that the nutritious and delicious food reaches even to those who cannot afford it. On solar eclipse, Diwali, Makarsankranti or any other festival, I prefer to distribute fruits to janitors and sweepers.

Tula daan means charity equivalent to one’s weight. From my birth until today, my weight is measured and foodstuffs of equal weight are donated to needy person(s). The optimistic thing about this daan is that my weight is still on increasing trend. ;)

So today, is the day for feeding others with chole bhature. It is my humble request with everyone to celebrate 3^rd December after my death as chole bhature day! :)

How many times do you breathe in a minute?

 

“How many times do you breathe in a minute?” The teacher asked the class of trps students, a training course for income tax return filing. “When I say ‘START’, begin counting your breathes and after one minute I will say ‘STOP’ then you all have to stop counting and tell me the number of times you have breathed in one minute.”

In February 2007, I was one of the students of this class. Every student stated the number of breaths around 18 except me.

“It can’t be 5!” He said surprisingly. “Chandrika, do not take long breaths like in pranayama. Just breathe normally.”

I counted again by taking short breaths as much as possible. This time it was 7! I must be doing it incorrectly. Leave it. My mind went back to the teacher’s voice.

“A normal person breathes 12-25 times in a minute. I am breathing 32 times in a minute and my doctor tells me that I will not be able to live a long life like a tortoise.” He chuckled. “He asks to quit smoking, as I am chain smoker. I drink heavily on weekends and I love nightlife. I have a girl friend, she is C.A. like me. Tell me something about yourself, any student.” 

The students were as bore as the subject.

He would then explain where they first met, what she liked, what were their future plans. All of sudden he would then start teaching the subject matter again. He used this trick to grasp the attention of students, as most of us were non-commerce students with no knowledge of income as well as tax. Moreover, we found it too difficult to focus on advance level of the subject matter without any foundation of money matters. He must be the only teacher on earth to teach income tax with a tinge of romance!

Now, I stay in Delhi and NCR. In polluted air, my normal breathing rate is 2-3 times per minute. If I am in a forest, sanctuary or in Himalayas then it drips. When I am doing meditation or pranayama it drops further and sometimes stops for a short period.

A person with stressed mind will have shorter breaths and a person with peaceful mind will have longer breaths that mean a tenses person will breathe more number of times in a minute than a calm person. If a person is in deep thinking or meditating then the breathing will be slow or suspended for some time. The breathing becomes irregular and unsteady if the mind is filled with negative emotions like anger, jealousy, envy and hatred. Mind and breathing are interrelated if you control one the other will be controlled involuntarily.

The easiest way to slow down your breaths is to exhale for longer time. Inhale gently and exhale slowly and completely. One can also practice yogic breathing with the proper use of diaphragm. Breathe in slowly; expand abdomen, then rib cage and finally the upper portion of lungs. Make the maximum use of your lung capacity. While inhaling imagines that, all the positive virtues like happiness, joy, peace and calmness are moving in. Breathe out gently, contract abdomen, then rib cage and finally relax upper portion of lungs. Concentrate on the air going out and imagining that all the negative emotions like anger, fear, hatred and stress are moving out.

How many times do you breathe in a minute? Count it. With practice, slow down it to experience happiness from within.

P.S. 1. Pic - Sketch is drawn by me.

The Power of Mantra

 

To quench my quest for meditation, I picked up the book ‘Meditation and Mantras’ by Swami Vishnu Devananda from the bookshelf of Nehra Library, Hisar which was one of the best libraries in India. Although it had a vast collection of books and journals mostly related to agriculture and its allied subjects even though it had a good collection of general books. In 1999, I often visited that library for my research work and sometimes just to pass the time.

I flipped the pages and saw a smiling photo of Swami Sivananda, founder of Divine Life Society. His irresistible smile was full of peace, kindness and compassion. His face was radiating with sheer bliss. Swami Vishnu Devananda had dedicated this book to his master.

To know why saints were always smiling, I got that book issued in my name. After thorough reading, I came to know about different ways of doing meditation as the theory and practical applicability were explained in detail. I was excited to try at least one but was not sure whether I would be doing it for long time or for a brief period just for fun.

I opted for the easiest one - Japa Meditation. It is building up or accumulating power of mantras by repeating them with love and devotion. There are different types of mantras. Saguna mantras (with form) e.g. Om Namah Sivaya, Om Namo Narayanana, Hari Om, nirguna mantras (without form) e.g. OM, abstract mantras e.g. Soham (I am That I am), Aham Brahma Asmi (I am Brahman) and beej mantras e.g. Aim, Hreem were listed. As there are, many paths to the top of a mountain so there are many mantras to God realisation. Which one should I chose? I did not know the correct pronunciation of beej mantras so I could not opt for them. Abstract mantras were abstruse and nirguna mantras were esoteric. I was left with only one option -Saguna mantras. It was easy to concentrate on the image of deity. The author emphasised that neither mantra nor deity once selected can be changed. To maintain good speed one has to stick to one path, one mantra and one deity to avoid spread of his/her energies in exploring all the other alternative paths.

I feared that if I selected a difficult mantra, I might lose interest after some time or might found it hard to chant because of change in responsibilities with time. As I would be bound to one mantra and one deity therefore, I chose the easiest mantra and the simplest of all the deities so that I could stick to it throughout my life.

I fixed an hour for chanting, focusing and meditating on that mantra facing East at the same place. To my surprise, I started having experiences in meditation as mentioned in that book just after a few months. Experiences only assured me that I was moving on the right path but for further progress, I had to ignore them completely. My goal was not the vibrant lights but the Darshan of the deity. According to Divine Life Society, if one does the chanting of mantra 13 crores of times with faith and devotion, the deity manifest itself in front of him/her.

With time, my responsibilities increased and I could not afford to sit for meditation for long hours then I decided to chant the mantra while doing my daily activities like car driving, waiting for business meeting, cooking, walking, swimming and even while moving in an elevator. My hands were busy with the work but my mind was remembering God all the time rather most of the time. I had chanted that mantra crores and crores of times. Yet I had not chanted it 13 crores times!

Constant repetition of God’s name had helped me to put a check on my negative emotions to some extent. I was not satisfied with my progress as they sprang up every now and then. The Nature showered It’s kindness and manifested in the form of Human Guru as Om Swamiji who not only helped in removing my unpleasant emotions but also showed the right divine path. His presence, words and teachings removed the thick dark forest of ignorance and purified me. His grace and presence spiritually elevated me. He is an ocean of bliss, knowledge and compassion. He helped me in lifting my head from the quagmire of worldly maya.

Swami Sivananda says, “The Guru is God Himself manifesting in a personal form to guide the aspirant. Grace of God takes the form of the Guru. To see the Guru is to see God.”

P.S.- 1. If you missed out the story of Kalavati told by Om Swamiji then you can watch it here.

2.  Amidst my chanting routine, I never forget to take my daily dose of Pingu, Shaun the Sheep or Chip and Dale to keep the kid inside me alive. ;)

3. Pic was clicked by me at Kishangarh, Rajasthan

Namopathy - A panacea

 

“Ma, please tell a story.” I requested in feeble voice as I saw her entering my room. I made such requests nearly 10-12 times a day sometimes even more.

She replied, “As soon as I am free, I will narrate you interesting story from the new book. It is about a bear that lived in the snow. The book is full of coloured pictures. But right now, I am busy with household chores and looking after your younger brother.”

“The bear lives in the forest not in the snow.”

“It is a different story.”

I lied down quietly on the bed eagerly waiting for the different story.

I was on bed at the age of four and a half years. My whole body was covered with different sizes and shapes of pustules. The pain was unbearable. But I did not cry. I did not shed tears. My only way to escape from reality of aches was into the world of imagination!

My father hardly got ant time to tell me a story but whenever he got some, he used to tell me the same story about the monkey and the crocodile from the Panchtantra.

One day, when I get bored of repeated narrations, I said, “Papa, why do you always tell me the same story? I do not want to listen it repeatedly. Please tell me some other story.”

“I tell you the truth. I do not know any story. I learnt this story only for you.” My father replied. “I am busy. Whatever time I get, I give it you instead of giving it to your infant bro.” As he stood up from the chair to go away, I asked him to repeat the same tale. It was better to hear the same story instead of none.

My naniji (maternal grandmother) knew many stories from Ramayana, Mahabharata and Puranas. She was an excellent narrator of folk tales and fairy tales. She was never short of stories. However, she occasionally visited us because of her household responsibilities and her health. She could tell stories for hours and hours without taking a break. Her visit was always a jackpot for me!

 “Once, there was a school going boy named Chandan who used to live in a village with her mother. They were very poor as his father was no more and her mother earned little by selling cow’s milk.” My nanaji (my maternal grandfather and my mother’s uncle) narrated this to me. He came to know that my health was deteriorating fast and I would not be able to live for more days. All the doctors in the town were consulted but nobody knew what the disease was! Allopathic medicines were worsening my condition day by day. My parents were tensed. To relieve us, one day he came to our home after his office hours.   

“He had to cross a dense forest to go to school which was situated in the nearby village. His classmates were rich who came to school on carts but Chandan was the only boy in the school who came on foot. One day, the teacher asked all students to bring milk from their home. All the students were rich who can easily spare milk. Chandan could not bring the milk as her mother sold the milk in lieu of wheat floor for the dinner. Next day, everybody brought milk except Chandan. The teacher scolded him. Without giving any ear to his story, he forced him to bring milk immediately. He disappointedly went to his home and told the whole story to his mother. Her mother said, “Why does the teacher need so much milk?”

 “The teacher’s daughter marriage has been fixed day after tomorrow and the teacher has to give a good feast to the bharatis.”

“Go and ask Gopala (protector of cow and a name for Lord Krishna), He will arrange it for you.”

He started back for school. In the middle of the forest, he closed his eyes and cried “Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala,

Gopala, Gopala, Gopala,Gopala, Gopala, Gopala.”

“What happened next?” I asked.

“He is calling God for help. Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala, Gopala. (One mala – 108 times)”

Lord Krishna manifested in front of him and asked politely, “My child, why are you calling me? What do you need?”

He shared his problem with God. He listened to him and gave him a lauta (small vessel). He took it and looked in it. It had very little milk.

He said, “The milk is not enough. The teacher wanted the full lauta, moreover this lauta is too small. Gopala, atleast fill it to the brim.”

Krishna said, “Give this lauta to your teacher.” And He disappeared.

Half-heartedly he took the path to the school. He gave lauta to the teacher. The teacher mocked at the size of the lauta. The teacher poured the milk in the bucket. The bucket got filled and some milk spitted on the floor. Surprisingly, the mini lauta still had milk in it. The teacher rushed to his house which was nearby and filled drums, kadhais, patilas, and all the big vessels he had. But lauta still had milk. The greedy teacher started filling all the small vessels like glass, katori (bowl) etc. with milk. The lauta still had milk. The teacher got tired of, realised his mistake, and asked for forgiveness.

That very day, my nani suggested the name of a vaidji (Ayurvedic doctor) to my father. Next day, in the morning we were in his clinics. The vaidji checked my eyes, tongue, nadi etc. and told that the medicines given to her reacted; the blood became impure which resulted in pustules. He suggested that every morning I should take fresh neem juice, mishri (sweet granules to beat bitterness) and roasted channa (helps in fresh blood formation) before eating anything. He also prescribed medicated oil for applying on my ruptured skin.

My father fed me bitter medicines and my nanaji (grandfather) told me stories of Chandan in which he was trapped in some trouble, called Gopala for help and then some magic happens for three-four months until I was cured. My nanaji gradually increased the number of malas in between the stories. One such story had 108 malas of Gopala which means 11664 times.

According to Swami Sivananda, “When Allopathy, Homeopathy, Chromopathy, Naturopathy, Ayurvedopathy and other ‘pathies’ fail to cure a disease, the Divine Namopathy alone can save you, The Name of the Lord is a sovereign specific, a sheet anchor, an infallible panacea and a cure all for diseases.

Gopala saved me! :)

P.S. – Photo clicked by me

Digital Library

Near about 20 years back.....

“It’s retro Jupiter and not combust Mars which is causing problems in your life.” My family astrologer confidently told me. At that time, I did not have the knowledge of astrology. Even though his statement was contrary to other astrologers but I had firm believe in predictions. As per his suggestions, I did charity work related to Jupiter to dilute its negative effects. Even now, I did them regularly.

Near about 15 years back.....

I studied astrology to know the truth. I found out that my family astrologer was right because Jupiter aspects strengthens Mars as well as removes the negativity of Mars and moreover Jupiter damaged the house in which it is placed. At that time, most of the problems in my life were related to the house occupied by Jupiter. I decided to do more charity work related to Jupiter like donating mango, books, yellow coloured clothes, gold etc.

Near about 7 years back.....

As Jupiter represents education and learning, I started a charitable library in a commercial space that I owned. From my personal collection, I donated near about 1000 books to the library and spared my four almirahs for keeping books. My friends, relatives, neighbours and even strangers donated books generously. Popular newspapers and magazines were subscribed to attract all age groups. A part time librarian was appointed to look after it.

Near about 6 years back.....

A nominal fee of Rs. 200/- was fixed as security of two books that can be issued at a time to a member. Seven persons registered out of that only two or three were regular visitors. The rest did not bother to visit as they did not have interest in reading books or they issued books of more price than security and returning them would be a lost affair.   

Near about 3.5 years back.....

I kept pushing, dreaming that one day it would be full of students. My money was draining in librarian salary, newspaper bill and maintenance charges. After librarian’s wife died, he resigned, as he had to look after his grandchildren. After tiring search, I was not able to find a librarian in my budget. I had to put a lock on the library. I failed.

Near about 3 years back.....

Whenever I failed, I jot down the reasons why I failed.

1.      The library was located at commercial place. It was amidst a posh colony of the town. It was close to two main schools.

2.      The place was well illuminated and ventilated.

3.      I had the books for all age groups and on various subjects.

4.      The library was located in North- East of the building. (According to Vastushastra, it is the best place for studying.)

5.      There was good sitting arrangement with basic electric facilities.

6.      I did the proper marketing by advertising in newspapers and on cable T.V.

7.      The fees were nominal.

Then, why did I fail???

I prepare a list of persons from whom I can seek guidance and advice in this matter.

On the top of the list was the name of my former colleague who had retired from the post of librarian from a reputed college. She patiently listened to my problems then explained that people had lost interest in reading books. They loved to read on internet. Change the library as per the demand of the people. She introduced me to digital library, a library that neither had any librarian nor any books but remained full of students. She assured me to show such a successfully running library in her vicinity.

I rushed to her place.

She accompanied me in collecting all information and data needed to start a digital library. Now, I had a new idea, new concept, new motive but no funds.

Near about 2 years back.....

I sharply cut my personal expenses to drain my funds for the renewal of library. The digital library now had desks with selves and comfortable chairs to accommodate more number of students. To monitor the students CCTV cameras were fitted. A Wi-Fi connection with unlimited data was installed so that the students could learn without any obstruction. Fans, lights, power back up and all the modern facilities were there! But students were not there!!

Near about one and a half year back....

I advertised again on local cable TV and newspapers. At last, one student joined! He came regularly from 10am to 2:30pm on weekdays and took breaks on weekends and other holidays to spend time with his family. He was preparing for civil services. Two more students joined but didn’t showed up after two-three months.

Near about one and a half month back....

I called my employee Mr. ‘A’.

I – How many students are coming these days in the library?

A – Two old and three new students.

I – What new students are preparing for?

A – One boy is preparing for tax and another for police and the girl is preparing for service.

I – How do they come?

A – The two boys came from two different nearby villages on bus. And the girl came from a nearby colony on scooty. The boys came according to bus timings. They came early so I opened the library at 7:30am and they left late in the evening. I closed it at 6pm.

I – I will pay you extra for that. Do they move out of library in between 10.5 hours time?

A – No, they bring their lunch from home. The whole day they sit together and study together.

I – Are they coming regularly?

A – Yes, they came even on weekends and do not take any break on religious festivals.

I – Have they paid their fees?

A – Yes, they have paid the previous month fees but now they are asking for two days discount as I have closed the library for two days because of local lockdown for sanitisation for corona.

I – Are they asking for two days discount???

A – I told them, “In this library, you have to pay only Rs. 200/- per month for unlimited data and unlimited time where as the prevalent market rate is Rs.600/- per fortnight for only 6 hours and Rs.1200/- per fortnight for 12 hours. The total fees of all the students is not enough to pay WiFi bill as WiFi charges are too high in this area and the other expenses like maintenance are also borne by us. And now you are asking for 13 rupees and 30 paisa discount?!!”

I smiled.

If there are students in my library who study nonstop for 10 long hours, without any break and want to save Rs.13/- even, then success is not far behind. One day, my digital library will be full of serious studious students.

I will succeed.

P.S. 1. Pic : Clicked by me as I love to play scrabble.