Too hot, too cold!

“In a restaurant whenever I eat food, the first morsel of food is too hot that it burns sensitive skin of my mouth whereas the last morsel of food is too cold that it becomes difficult for me to chew it properly.” Mrs. ‘L’ said.

Do you also feel the same?

Rich beggar

Today, I read in the newspaper that a beggar died with Rs. 1.98 lakhs in his pocket.

These days, are the beggars really poor!?

A mail

I received this mail.

On a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere, the following group
of people are shipwrecked :-

2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman.
2 French men and 1 French woman.
2 German men and 1 German woman.
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman.
2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman.
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 Chinese men and 1 Chinese woman.
2 Australian men and 1 Australian woman.
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman.
2 English men and 1 English woman.
2 Swiss men and 1 Swiss woman.

One month later on the same island in the middle of nowhere, the following
things have occurred:
One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

The two French men and the French woman are living happily together in a
ménage-à-trois.

The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of alternating visits with
the German woman.

The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is
cleaning and cooking for them.

The two Bulgarian men took one long look at the endless ocean, another long
look at the Bulgarian woman, and started swimming.

The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting instruction>

The two Chinese men have set up a pharmacy, a liquor store, a restaurant and
a laundry, and have got the woman pregnant in order to supply employees for
their stores.

The two Australian men are contemplating suicide because the Australian
woman keeps complaining about her body; the true nature of feminism; how she
can do everything they can do; the necessity of fulfilment; the equal
division of household chores; how sand and palm trees make her look fat; how
her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her nicer than they do;
how her relationship with her mother is improving, and how at least the
taxes are low and it isn't raining.

The two Irish men have divided the island into North and South and have set
up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it
gets sort of foggy after the first few litres of coconut whisky. But they're
satisfied because at least the English aren't having any fun.

The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English
woman.

The two Swiss man opened a bank and married the Bulgarian and the Japanese
women. The Swiss women founded a feminist Group and supported all the women on the island.

Do you think racial humor is funny or offensive?

Bidi time!

An elderly man who was sitting on a mudah made puff and handover the bidi to the elderly woman. She was sitting beside him on a peedah. She took it in her wrinkled hand, inhaled and filled her mouth and lungs with smoke. She passed that same bidi to the man while puffing.

Do you think they were saving a bidi or they were enjoying bidi smoking in each other’s company?

Story of a confident guy

Part 1
“There is a huge beehive on the neem tree. I am an expert in collecting honey from beehives. If you permit me I can collect.”
“You can come in the evening to do that.” I replied.
“I am skilled to do that even at noon hours. Actually ma’am I know a mantra which I chant and after that all the bees will leave this place and will go to some other place. I will collect the honey from the vacant beehive.”
“It is dangerous to do it at daytime. Better come at the dusk.”
“I am prepared with my long stick, on which kerosene dipped rugs have been tied. I will set fire to scare the worker bees to grasp the queen bee. I am ready with my bucket to collect honey.” He showed his blue colored bucket to me.
“I have to go to attend a meeting at some other site.”
“When you will return then you can see my expertise skills, ma’am.”

Part 2
Three hours later when I returned, I found the stick with burnt rugs on one edge lying on the ground. I looked up and beehive was still there and the same blue colored bucket which was in the hands of confident guy was now on the top branch of neem tree.

Do you think he forgot the mantra or lost his confidence in front of thousands of stings?

Lost my book

“Return my favourite book if you have read it.” I said to my friend.
“A day before yesterday, I took it with me on my Mumbai trip so that in the journey I could read it. On my returning flight after complete reading, I placed it in the pocket of the front seat. I forgot to take it out. Sorry yaar.”

Should I scold him for misplacing my favourite book or should I be happy as someone else will be reading that book?

A man covering his face

In a marriage party, dance floor was full with the young persons doing sexy moves. The gathering was enjoying the high pitch music with fast dance movements. I saw near about eighty year old man sitting in the front row covering his face with his left hand. To my utmost surprise his eyes were peeping to observe those dance steps by young female members of his family.

Was he feeling ashamed or elated to observe such dance moves?